Denver Post South Suburban Edition 7/22/10

Denver Post South Suburban Edition 7/22/10






Short Fat and Happy





The Fat Kids returned to the softball diamond for the first time after suffering their first loss of the season. Unsure of how the team would respond, the mood was light and the team was a little sluggish to begin but the Fatties soon found their rhythm. On a night where the boys were left short handed and only playing with nine guys, they returned to their season form and played ball with a jovial spirit to pull out an 18-7 victory.

The team was shorthanded last night missing El Sukador, who had taken his search for the great mountain Yetti to the plains of Kansas, The Canadian who was probably peddling free health care, and Glass Jaw Holder who is still on the disabled list. The Fat kids made due with only 3 guys in the outfield which made Hollywood Bristow real excited to run around. “I drank like 3 mountain dews and ate a bunch of candy out of the concessions before I showed up so I would have enough energy to burn” said Hollywood. Yeah, cause you need to have more energy. He wasn’t the only getting his running in and the Yahoos picked on The Chode Cannode out in right field. He had enough fight left in him to make a great catch on a hard line drive that died at the last second and The Chode “snow coned” it, mmm snow cones. Other great defensive plays from The Swinging Siv on a hot line drive and a sliding catch by the Cycle Machine in left kept the Yahoos potent offense at bay.

The offense made an appearance last night as well. Unfortunately the offensive highlights were rather offensive with the arrival of the belly flop competition that broke out. The Swinging Siv “slide” into third where it was more of a “I am going to gently lower myself to the ground in a really awkward way” which was followed by a Calm Kyle “I’m not fast enough to score from second so I am gonna take you out” slide at home. He was called out, still not fast enough. The flop that stole the show was a Flying Squirrel flop performed by The Chode where he did a front flip over the catcher to land on the plate. Not fast enough to be called safe, but acrobatic enough. It was also another week of solid hitting from the usual suspects like Hippie, Coach Jim Jim, and UGA. Oh and another thing, can we get a picture of what a stop sign looks like and what it means because I am pretty sure Hollywood has never seen a stop sign he couldn’t run through.

The Fat kids are 6-1 on the season and pick things up again next week with a 7:10 game.